I was recently doom scrolling on Facebook when one of those annoying AI videos came on—you know, the ones that take basic text and make it into a song that has no real flow or lyrical styling at all. This one was talking about dogs that lick.
The "song" was informing the listener that a licking dog is not trying to show affection, but is actively trying to fulfill a lack of connection. Upon hearing that, my ears perked because I thought that was a pretty broad-stroke statement for a behavior that is not only innate in dogs, but has many different causes—even when it's done excessively.
The following are some of the reasons why a dog may lick you, themselves, or random things excessively.
Affection and Bonding
Yes, dogs will lick people, even excessively, due to a lack of connection or to foster one. It is a ritualized greeting that dogs use to communicate "love" to the recipient and create a sense of security. If a dog is licking you, it's likely not saying that it is afraid of you, stressed, or has any intent to harm you. It can be seen as a dog "kiss," but that's not always the sole purpose.
Appeasement Behavior
Some dogs lick other dogs or people as appeasement behavior—a way of not only calming down the one being licked, but also calming themselves down. This is a form of self-regulation. Some may find it difficult to tell the difference, but appeasement licking is often paired with other stress signs. Perhaps the dog approaches low to the ground or with their head dipped towards the floor, ears back, tail low (if not tucked), or showing whale eye. If you see this type of body language followed by excessive licking of you, themselves, or another dog, it is likely a stress response.
Seeking Attention
Dogs are always going to repeat behavior that is reinforced. If a dog learns that licking you results in getting attention, pets, or play, it's something they will repeat. Even asking your dog to stop licking you or pushing them away can be reinforcing. While this is similar to affection and bonding, the reason may no longer be for affection, but to solicit whatever normal response results from the licking.
In the evening, if your dog learns that you will get up and feed them because they start annoying you with licks, they may lick you to get fed. If you always start petting them, they may lick you to get pet. You may not notice these types of patterns, but your dog certainly does—and you will now.
Sensory Exploration
We humans are a strange and tasty species. Not only does our sweat taste nice and salty, which dogs love, but we also use all manner of lotions and products that have different scents and tastes. Dogs will not only use their nose for this exploration but their tongue as well. Sometimes, they also lick our faces and hands because that is what touched the food. So yeah, sometimes dogs will lick us because we simply taste good.
Stress and Anxiety
As I said before, dogs sometimes lick in order to calm themselves down and reduce stress. I have seen many stressed or anxious dogs who obsessively lick people and themselves. I have an older yellow lab who does that in stressful or anxious situations. That stress can be caused by numerous things that may cause them to feel unsafe or threatened in their environment. But licking can release endorphins that are useful in calming your dog down, and they will lick because of that calming effect. You may see a dog that licks in his crate while experiencing separation anxiety, licks himself at the vet, or licks his own paws excessively during thunderstorms. This is likely a stress response.
I have also seen this type of behavior get misinterpreted in the family environment when children are involved. There have been cases of dogs who show what are interpreted as "mixed" signals with children. The dog may be near the children, appear to be okay with the interaction, and lick their faces and hands, but then suddenly be scared, growl, or bark. In this type of case, it's likely that the dog's licking is a "kiss to dismiss." Even if the dog follows the child around, this kind of behavior is likely a sign of stress and should be regarded as a warning sign. If you see this, even if you aren't sure, keep the dog and child separated until you get the help of a qualified professional.
Medical
Sometimes dogs will lick themselves, people, or other objects obsessively when they are experiencing some sort of medical issue. If a dog is feeling nauseous, you may see them licking people or surfaces like a toddler with an ice cream cone on a 98° day. This is often a sign of physical or medical distress, and you should consult the advice of a veterinarian right away.
So there are actually multiple reasons why a dog might lick someone excessively. Part of resolving that issue has more to do with identifying the reason than anything else. Clearly, if your dog is seeking reinforcement in return for the behavior, you can stop "paying" the behavior and pay something different—such as a dog resting a chin on you, laying down, or bringing you a toy. If your dog is experiencing anxiety, fear, or stress, that might require the help of a behavioral vet or dog trainer that specializes in dealing with those sorts of behavioral issues.
In conclusion, it's not always about the one thing your dog is doing that annoys you or seems off; it's also about the "why," and that is what should inform your next steps. It doesn't make a lot of sense for you to work on training your dog to resist licking you if it's for a medical reason they cannot control. So make sure you get to the root of it and start there. In the long run, it will save you time, money, and frustration.
If you have an obsessive licker, or any other obsessive annoying behavior, and your care team has ruled out medical causes, reach out for help. Leap Canine Coaching offers free in-person consults in central Indiana, or free virtual consults anywhere else. You can reply here, email me at jimmy@leapcanine.com, or click this link.
